Never Give Up

"Grace bats last." (Anne Lamott)

I looked out the window a little more than an hour before sunrise and saw the kind of clouds that could produce a great sunrise coming in from the west. After all the colorless skies the past few months, I was excited and the timing seemed kind of perfect given the events of yesterday. Unfortunately, by the time I got to the lake the clouds had unexpectedly moved low to the horizon and mostly out of the picture. The early color never materialized and with the wind blowing strongly it was unlikely I’d have any birds hanging out nearby. (Birds tend to be a lot more skittish in the wind.)

People were putting boats in with the unseasonably warm weather and I found myself breathing some horrible exhaust fumes. I gave up on the sunrise. I walked down the bank and was watching some crows for a while. When I happened to turn around I was completely surprised to see this:

While my back was turned, the clouds had come in and a beautiful (if brief) late sunrise was in progress! It’s pretty rare in my experience here for the beauty to hit it’s peak 20 minutes after sunrise, more normally it’s 20 minutes before sunrise. Today the universe reminded me - again - never to give up.

This morning seemed to put some perspective on the week. Tuesday I felt positive and calm seeing the high voter turnout. Surely my country would oust the con man in record numbers. By Tuesday night that feeling had turned to dread that literally made me sick to my stomach, watching the returns come in and fearing for the future. All day Wednesday I kept repeating the Anne Lamott quote I put at the top of this post: “Grace bats last.”

Friday the totals switched and I started to hope again, but I was still unprepared for how it felt when the news agencies finally called it for Joe Biden. Relief is not a strong enough word. A weight lifted, the ability to take a deep breath - and then the desire to sing and dance and SMILE. I can’t remember the last time I smiled and danced, but yesterday I did both. A lot!

When things are going well in my life I often find song lyrics appearing in my head to guide me. The songs have been silent for a while but for the past two days they have returned. Today as I left the lake I heard, “Let freedom ring, let the white dove sing, let the whole world know that today is a day of reckoning. Let the weak be strong, let the right be wrong. Roll the stone away, let the guilty pay, it’s Independence Day”. (Martina McBride, “Independence Day”).

I pray the songs - and the joy - continue. We still have so much work to do, but at least now we have a chance.