As migration season has drawn to a close, I feel an increasing desire to turn inward. It seems like the opposite of what I’m supposed to feel with the coming of summer after two years of pandemic. Many I know feel the urge to get out, go, do or travel. This is not the first time my impulse now has been to turn inward, but it may be the strongest.
I feel a little old and curmudgeonly when I say summer is hot, crowded, buggy, and noisy - especially after 7 AM! All too soon the fireworks will start. The joggers, bike riders, and dog walkers get up earlier and there are races on the weekends. Yet none of that is really why I’m feeling the impulse to turn inward. The impulse is deeper, those are just my external excuses.
It feels more like an impulse to rest. Can I call it an impulse to nest? A lot of change and chaos is happening in the outside world. A lot of change is happening in my inner world. Even just the time change, early sunrise, and going to bed before it’s dark have me feeling less rested than I’d like to be. Perhaps there’s something new waiting to emerge that needs time in the nest. Perhaps it’s just an ongoing need for solitude as Mary Chapin Carpenter so beautifully sang about.
This year I’ve decided to honor this impulse as fully as I can, rather than pushing myself to do something else. I’m choosing to honor this impulse in a number of ways:
I’ve been listening to programs by Thich Nhat Hanh from SoundsTrue, including “Drops of Emptiness”
I’ve been using the “Ten-Percent Happier” meditation app regularly (you can access a free 30-day guest pass here)
I’ve joined Cloud Sangha, an online meditation community, and become part of a regular practice group
I’ve enrolled in a 10-week Mindful Self Compassion course for the summer
I’m creating a cozy meditation space in my basement where I can be held deeply by the earth as I practice breathing in, breathing out, and holding myself and others in my heart.
Maybe I’m following the lead of this turtle, who crawled out to the water, enjoyed the waves briefly, and then crawled back to where ever his out-of-the-way resting spot is. If only I had my own shell!
Meanwhile, I have a backlog of photos from migration still to be shared! The brightly colored birds and butterflies have arrived. Some of the larger babies have already emerged from the nest!
Whatever you are feeling, may you honor it as best you can in the midst of whatever challenges life has brought your way.
I agree wholeheartedly with all you've shared. :) With the shift into the Age of Aquarius upon us (knowing the God/Source/Creator within and as ourselves vs Pisces (knowing it without) ) seems in our own unique ways we are all becoming our own turtle. :)
Wouldn't it be wonderful to have a shell where you can instantly disappear into it and no one can get in! It sounds very much from all your meditation activities that it is time for you to quietly go inwards