Anticipation and Abundance
May 5, 2024
Spring migration is in full swing and moving fast. I’ve found myself saying I wish I had more time - but it truly wouldn’t matter how much time I had, it wouldn’t be enough. Every minute of every day there is something new and wonderful happening. Even when it’s too dark for the camera, wonderful surprises appear, like this pregnant possum waddling her way to shelter before the rains came in.
Not only do I want to be everywhere all at once, but I also want to keep walking and not head home. I feel my inner child saying, “just a little longer, plllleeeeeeeeaaassssseeeeeee?” Sometimes I say yes. Sometimes making that choice is not viable or healthy. My body is clear she needs rest, food, other types of movement, and other forms of self-care like qigong and meditation. As Katy Bowman says, “Walking is great, but if the only movement you do is walking, it’s like eating only broccoli and expecting to be healthy.” I also have a job and the regular chores have to be done. These needs don’t stop because too much is happening, whether or not the “too much” is joyful.
It’s always tempting though - because the joys are so wonderful! I saw the first yellow-billed cuckoo of the season, the earliest date I’ve ever seen a cuckoo. I think of cuckoo’s as showing up around my birthday, later in May, and was delighted to see one on May 3rd. I still remember the first time I saw - and heard - a cuckoo. I was completely surprised to find out that they were REAL BIRDS and not just little wooden figures in a clock!
Every day new birds appear, testing my memory to see if I can piece together what I am seeing and come up with a name. Many of them are at the tops of the trees, nearly out of range for my camera. This time of year I always wish I has more zoom too, and find myself daydreaming about the new (very expensive) lenses with more zoom that are still at a weight I can carry. I do my best with persistence and cropping!
It’s wonderful having the singers of summer back. Orioles were the first birds I heard, followed quickly by indigo buntings, warblers, and so many more. I continue to work on identifying birds by ear using the Merlin Bird Id sound identification feature. Although I love taking photos, sometimes I just stop to listen and take in all the sounds.
I’ve seen far fewer shorebirds than I have in some years - though I have seen quite a few out in the flooded fields. They probably don’t need the tiny landing area at the lake when they have all these fresh mudflats to explore! We went from drought to (so far minor) flooding in less than a week, but it’s good for the migrating shorebirds if not so great for the photographer. All is not lost though, I was looking at my favorite Avocet photos and realized they were taken on May 10th. There is still possibility!
As I watched the shorebirds in the field, a couple I have talked to a few times walked by. The gentleman asked what I was seeing and I pointed out the shorebirds. As they walked away he said, “I hope you see something amazing today!” I only had about 15 minutes left before I had to leave to get home for work, so the odds were slim. So guess what happened as I started to leave 15 minutes later? All the sudden there were three Mississippi kites over my head. They landed briefly in the nearby trees and then one took off low right over my head! I’ve never been this close to Mississippi kites! Very grateful for the magical wish bestowed on me.
The swallows continue to dazzle me every morning, swooping past my head, out over the water, up in the air, and engaging in minor aerial battles. In addition to the tree swallows, barn swallows, and purple martins, I saw cliff swallows and northern rough-winged swallows this week. Only the bank swallows have yet to make an appearance in my field of vision.
I’ve seen and heard Caspian terns flying on the far side of the lake, their loud, raspy, squawks are music to my ears. The Forester’s terns continue to play king of the buoy, but with all the rain I can’t get quite as close to them now.
I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the warblers. There are many birders who are more adept at spotting warblers than I am. They like to be way up at the tops of the trees where the bugs are apparently more abundant. Merlin Bird Id - and some other birders I know - can hear them when I cannot. It doesn’t matter though, because I am just as exited by every one of them I am able to find. I’ve seen - but not been able to photograph - Nashville warblers, northern parulas, and yellow warblers so far. Only one warbler - the blackpoll warbler - came close enough for a photo.
Every morning I leave full of anticipation. Truly, I am full of anticipation most mornings year-round when I leave for the lake. Yet in spring that anticipation is amped higher with all the possibilities. I was reminded today that anticipation is the flip-side of anxiety. They are both energized, curious, and moving with possibility. The difference is anticipation is joyful and anxiety is fearful.
I’m learning a process to try and bring the anticipation I feel in nature into other parts of my life, where I tend to be anxious. The process is called “anchoring”. When I feel that feeling of anticipation or joy, I’m supposed to remember to anchor it with a specific kinesthetic movement. I chose a loosely closed left fist for my anchor. I don’t always remember to do it in the moment, so I’ve added an end-of-day review process where I try to recall the feeling and anchor it then. The idea is that the more you do it, especially in the moment, the more you can recall the feeling later with the movement.
Once anchored, the next step is to practice using my anchor when I feel anxious to remind me that the energy tells me of possibilities and they could be joyful. It’s a work in progress!
I wasn’t sure I had enough photos today to do justice to the onslaught that is spring migration. Now I realize this is one of the longest posts I’ve ever put out! Even with all the birds I haven’t been able to photograph, there is still so much abundance!
Sometimes there are more joyful opportunities than this one small human can manage. Learning to trust means learning it’s ok to let some of these possibilities pass me by without trying to experience them all. Humans like to pretend we are limitless, but it has never been true. Learning to work within my limits is an act of faith as much as walking through hardships. I’d sure rather learn to trust in abundance than through the most challenging times. Every moment is an opportunity to learn.
What’s happening in your little slice of the world?
These images are amazing Karen. I have never seen a Mississippi Kite before - what an amazing-looking bird. I do hope Momma Possum was able to get shelter before the rains!
Karen, here's a real thing ... I use your posts as one of my anchors!!!! I am always more centered by spending the time to take-in the earthly beauty you share along with your narratives. I sometimes hold your posts knowing that they will lift my spirit later in the day when I may need that. The treasures found in your posts are so numerous! I truly thank you.