This week I've been getting a lesson in leading with the heart too—in writing. I've been working in fits and starts on my next book and not understanding why it wasn't taking off. Finally I realized: I am starting each of these chapters with a mental idea of where they should go! It's deadly for the writing. To be fresh, I need to be open to where THEY want to go. I need to follow my nose. I need to stay in the heart, and move from THERE. For me it means shifting to a stance of listening. It's like practicing beginner's mind, stepping away from a stance of thinking I know what needs to happen. Listening is so much more humble. And so much more fun. And yes, the writing is moving again.
So sorry to hear you fell. Gosh, sounds like a bad fall. I like how you took that experience and are turning it round and round seeing the parallels and lessons there for the taking. Hope you are on the mend soon! 💜
Thank you! I have a knee/leg challenge and certainly notice I have less pain and complication if I go slowly..if I relax into my low back to saunter slowly. The idea of leading with the heart resonates....I'll see how it goes -- tricky to keep awareness there when we're used to solving everything mentally. Good luck with ongoing healing and increased mobility -- also my goal for myself. Cheers!
So beautiful! Thank you for sharing how we can make a conscious choice to lead with our hearts and not our minds. I will use with my clients in my bodywork training!
The swallow and hawk photo is fantastic - well-done!
I really like the idea of leading with your heart instead of your head. That makes a lot of sense to me...plus, the physical element of looking ahead instead of down to the ground - putting the heart out forces the head up instead of down...that just makes a lot of sense!
Really loved this and so relatable. The other day I became aware of how much tension was in my body-I, too, have the furrowed brown lines-and as I was walking around the lake it occurred to me how tight everything was in my body. With some conscious awareness and deep breathing, I was able to relax. I really relate to what you wrote and thank you so much!
Yes! I've been working on the tension since the sciatica last year made it clear to me how tense I was. I keep finding new places and ways I hold that tension. An ever-evolving practice.
Great quote for reflection ❤️👍. A lot of my tumbles have come when in a hurry and not mindful of what my body/feet were doing….staying mindful of my physical body instead of in my racing thoughts is key… your quote can be physical or emotional meaning or both…👍❤️😍 great photos ❤️😍
Yeah, and it's so hard to stay mindful all the time. I was trying it this morning out walking and - just like meditation - I just had to come back to it over and over again. Thanks Sharon!
I furrow my brow too and I have a permanent crease between my eyebrows~” leading with your heart”~ love that. My tension is in my neck~ back~this week I am trying to rest when I first feel my back tighten up~ instead of pushing on ~ my mind is always going~ trying to slow it~ thank you ❤️
So have I, Catherine. When I study it, I realize the crease started in childhood when I was trying to understand the craziness going on around me. It became a permanent part of me.
I have had this crease as long as I can remember too. And Catherine, I know that busy mind! The first few days after I fell, I could really feel how much ENERGY my mind was taking and I had to take a break every hour to ice the bump and let my mind be still. Funny thing, I felt really good after all those breaks.
This reminds me of something my ballet teacher says, which is that you should hold your tension in the places where it matters. Dancers will often tense up their facial muscles or stiffen their fingers, as if that's going to help get higher jumps and multiple turns. When what they should really do is focus on core and postural muscles and rotators - that's a good kind of tension. That's tension that serves us and advances our purpose. But stiff fingers and a furrowed brow are merely a response to the stress of the moment. It may be impossible to release ALL the tension, but we can be mindful of holding it where it counts.
Wonderful reflection Karen. One of my most frequently used mantras is, "Slow down." Sometimes, when I am lit up with some kind of (largely unconscious) certainty that I need to speed up I can feel myself respond with, "yeah, yeah. . . " without slowing all! If I catch this (usually only when I have a close call with stepping wrong, turning an ankle etc.) I can expand this to: "If you slow down, no one will die." Sometimes this is enough to make me stop, often with a sense of tears in my throat and eyes, and then proceed more slowly. My nervous system was trained often and early to feel that being "too slow" was life threatening (and responds accordingly.) You are so right- the only way to change any of this is with embodied awareness- and like all things worth learning, it takes practice :)
Yes - if you slow down no one will die. And the inflection in that sentence can go in different places for different meaning too. Yes to practice! I was practicing this morning and just like with meditation I just had to come back to it over and over and over.
I know what you mean re: the tone/inflection of that statement. Happily I tend to hear it said in a very soft, kind, compassionate voice- as if a wiser part of me wants to gently let me know slowing down will be okay (hence the tears.)
Oh - I heard at least two ways that could both be kind and supportive! One was "if you slow down you are less likely to die and won't kill anyone else" and one was "if you slow down no one will kill you". But both heard in a very kind and supportive voice!
Jul 10, 2023·edited Jul 10, 2023Liked by Karen Davis
Oh wow- how interesting. I think the way my calm centre means it is- "you do not have to feel perpetually responsible for everything and everyone" (my go-to survival strategy from childhood that makes me speed up and try to do more, faster.)
Karen, I love this mantra "lead with your heart." Thank you for this post today...it was exactly what I needed to hear. You have so much awareness and curiosity! Bravo...thank you for this wisdom today.
This week I've been getting a lesson in leading with the heart too—in writing. I've been working in fits and starts on my next book and not understanding why it wasn't taking off. Finally I realized: I am starting each of these chapters with a mental idea of where they should go! It's deadly for the writing. To be fresh, I need to be open to where THEY want to go. I need to follow my nose. I need to stay in the heart, and move from THERE. For me it means shifting to a stance of listening. It's like practicing beginner's mind, stepping away from a stance of thinking I know what needs to happen. Listening is so much more humble. And so much more fun. And yes, the writing is moving again.
Wonderful insight, this post made me relax
Thank you Rav
So sorry to hear you fell. Gosh, sounds like a bad fall. I like how you took that experience and are turning it round and round seeing the parallels and lessons there for the taking. Hope you are on the mend soon! 💜
And thank you! Healing is never as best and linear as I would like.
I get the pain and recovery either way, might as well try to learn from it.
Yes, turning a negative into a positive. 💜
Thank you! I have a knee/leg challenge and certainly notice I have less pain and complication if I go slowly..if I relax into my low back to saunter slowly. The idea of leading with the heart resonates....I'll see how it goes -- tricky to keep awareness there when we're used to solving everything mentally. Good luck with ongoing healing and increased mobility -- also my goal for myself. Cheers!
Tricky to stay aware indeed. It’s like meditation, you just come back when you notice your awareness has wandered.
So beautiful! Thank you for sharing how we can make a conscious choice to lead with our hearts and not our minds. I will use with my clients in my bodywork training!
Thank you! Such a revelation for me that it was embodied.
The swallow and hawk photo is fantastic - well-done!
I really like the idea of leading with your heart instead of your head. That makes a lot of sense to me...plus, the physical element of looking ahead instead of down to the ground - putting the heart out forces the head up instead of down...that just makes a lot of sense!
Yes, to looking out instead of down! Thanks Jack!
I do love this, lead with your heart.
My fall lead to titanium being implanted in in my lower left leg. I needed to stop and make a change and I was not listening to my heart 💜
Oh dear! I have been saying prayers of gratitude every day since this fall because it is so easy to see how much worse it could have been.
Really loved this and so relatable. The other day I became aware of how much tension was in my body-I, too, have the furrowed brown lines-and as I was walking around the lake it occurred to me how tight everything was in my body. With some conscious awareness and deep breathing, I was able to relax. I really relate to what you wrote and thank you so much!
Yes! I've been working on the tension since the sciatica last year made it clear to me how tense I was. I keep finding new places and ways I hold that tension. An ever-evolving practice.
Great quote for reflection ❤️👍. A lot of my tumbles have come when in a hurry and not mindful of what my body/feet were doing….staying mindful of my physical body instead of in my racing thoughts is key… your quote can be physical or emotional meaning or both…👍❤️😍 great photos ❤️😍
Yeah, and it's so hard to stay mindful all the time. I was trying it this morning out walking and - just like meditation - I just had to come back to it over and over again. Thanks Sharon!
Yes easier said than done😊❤️
Karen, there is so much to digest here. It's going to take me a minute. Your friend, j.
Janisse, for me too! I'm going to be working with this for a while.
I furrow my brow too and I have a permanent crease between my eyebrows~” leading with your heart”~ love that. My tension is in my neck~ back~this week I am trying to rest when I first feel my back tighten up~ instead of pushing on ~ my mind is always going~ trying to slow it~ thank you ❤️
So have I, Catherine. When I study it, I realize the crease started in childhood when I was trying to understand the craziness going on around me. It became a permanent part of me.
I have had this crease as long as I can remember too. And Catherine, I know that busy mind! The first few days after I fell, I could really feel how much ENERGY my mind was taking and I had to take a break every hour to ice the bump and let my mind be still. Funny thing, I felt really good after all those breaks.
That is how I feel after taking a break~ then I feel it creep up again~
That’s when mine started~ for the same reason~ thanks for sharing
This reminds me of something my ballet teacher says, which is that you should hold your tension in the places where it matters. Dancers will often tense up their facial muscles or stiffen their fingers, as if that's going to help get higher jumps and multiple turns. When what they should really do is focus on core and postural muscles and rotators - that's a good kind of tension. That's tension that serves us and advances our purpose. But stiff fingers and a furrowed brow are merely a response to the stress of the moment. It may be impossible to release ALL the tension, but we can be mindful of holding it where it counts.
yes, that's it exactly!
Wonderful reflection Karen. One of my most frequently used mantras is, "Slow down." Sometimes, when I am lit up with some kind of (largely unconscious) certainty that I need to speed up I can feel myself respond with, "yeah, yeah. . . " without slowing all! If I catch this (usually only when I have a close call with stepping wrong, turning an ankle etc.) I can expand this to: "If you slow down, no one will die." Sometimes this is enough to make me stop, often with a sense of tears in my throat and eyes, and then proceed more slowly. My nervous system was trained often and early to feel that being "too slow" was life threatening (and responds accordingly.) You are so right- the only way to change any of this is with embodied awareness- and like all things worth learning, it takes practice :)
Yes - if you slow down no one will die. And the inflection in that sentence can go in different places for different meaning too. Yes to practice! I was practicing this morning and just like with meditation I just had to come back to it over and over and over.
I know what you mean re: the tone/inflection of that statement. Happily I tend to hear it said in a very soft, kind, compassionate voice- as if a wiser part of me wants to gently let me know slowing down will be okay (hence the tears.)
Oh - I heard at least two ways that could both be kind and supportive! One was "if you slow down you are less likely to die and won't kill anyone else" and one was "if you slow down no one will kill you". But both heard in a very kind and supportive voice!
Oh wow- how interesting. I think the way my calm centre means it is- "you do not have to feel perpetually responsible for everything and everyone" (my go-to survival strategy from childhood that makes me speed up and try to do more, faster.)
Lead with your heart. Love it. Take care of yourself x
Thanks Cali, you too!
Karen, I love this mantra "lead with your heart." Thank you for this post today...it was exactly what I needed to hear. You have so much awareness and curiosity! Bravo...thank you for this wisdom today.
Thanks Julie! I am definitely a curious kitten, lol. It is my saving Grace I think.
Oh! This is beautiful ✨ and so very much how I am feeling. The somatic resonance when the heart leads is just magical 💖
Thank you Lisa!